to the point of stupid

Day 30 – 127.8 lbs – 500 Calorie Day. I’m still havin’ the period, but is that why I’m not dropping? And no, .2 lbs does not count. I haven’t been starving, per say, for the last couple of days, but I am tired of having to think abou this so intensely all the time. I’d like to have my normal life back again. The thing I don’t look forward to is knowing that my life will probably never really be the “same” as it used to be. I will ALWAYS be fighting my sugar addiction demons. I’m no different than any other person, I suppose. We all have our demons.

Day 31 – 127.6 lbs – 500 Calorie Day. Another measely .2 lbs. This is pure insanity. I had MAYBE a small handful of popcorn at the movie theatre yesterday. That was IT, other than my regular allowed food, which I didn’t even eat all of. I’m beginning to think that this is going to be it for me. I do have 7 injections remaining. I am, of course, going to finish them out. Maybe I’ll be down another pound by then, but I don’t want to do this any more. I’m stoked about the rapid weight loss I experienced up front, but I’m highly frustrated that it stopped, and that I have not met my goal weight. Secretly, I was thinking that I would SURPASS my goal weight. Now I know that won’t be happening. Disappointing. But what are ya gonna do? Maybe I will have established good ENOUGH eating habits that when I can eat more again, and have more energy, the regular exercize I do will make that difference for me. Overall, this is to the point of stupid. It wasn’t at first, but it is now.


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