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anger and resentment setting in

I gave in and ate those 2 pecan delights pieces of heaven. Then I felt bad about it and didn’t eat anything else until dinner. I went to bed feeling kinda hungry. But I have to say that it was worth it to eat those little treats. Is this a good thing or a bad thing I’m doing?

Day 11 – 133.8 lbs – 500 Calorie Day. I dropped nearly a pound and a half from yesterday becasuse I truly ate nothing except for those little pecan delights and a tiny dinner. No fruit. No bread stick.

Horrible day today. I’m embarrassed for myself. For breakfast I had about 40 little frosted animal cookies. Yes, they were for the kids, but they were with me in my son’s classroom this morning. See, I didn’t want to leave them in the car because they would melt all over. I was reading with the kids, one on one, and in between each kid (there are 23 in the class) I had a cookie. Then on the way home I had a bunch more. I blew it! I went crazy! It was like it was my last day on earth and I had to eat all the cookies right now! They were so good and crunchy and sweet and off limits! I ate nothing else today, except for the rest of that pudding cup that someone left on the kitchen table and 3 little raviolis that someone left on the kitchen island, and a bite of a peanut butter filled cheese cracker. I’m crazy, I tell you! Funny thing is, with as little as I ate, I’m not even hungry right now. Goes to show you….. crap fills you up better than the good for you stuff does. I felt angry and resentful all afternoon and evening. But now I feel better. In fact, this evening at my daughter’s band concert I saw a good friend of mine who is almost done with a round of this. She looks great! And she spoke about it as if it is no big deal. She says that she has finally accepted it, and she’s in a groove now. Well, I hit my big road bump and I am determined that it will be my last. Better day tomorrow. I’m so curious what my weight will be in the morning.

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